Whilst I was away voting...

Okay, so while I was out voting, I left Jacob here at the house. Here is where I vote, (and I was the only person there) and what Google says about how to get there just so you know how long it took:

"Driving directions to Fort Worth Fire Station 24
0.8 mi – about 3 mins"

When I got back, I was greeted with a startled look and, "That was sure fast."

Upon walking into the kitchen, I noticed that the door to my baking cabinet (where I keep stuff like sugar, flour, vanilla, baking soda and whatnot) was slightly ajar despite the fact that I have not been baking today.

And then I was hit with the very strong smell of vinegar.

Knowing what I know about our science experiment today (Newton's third law of motion) and its inclusion of balloons, it doesn't take me long to conclude that in the very short time it took me to vote, my son was making baking soda / Vitamin C powder and vinegar grenades.

He must have heard me pull up in the driveway and rushed to clean everything up because there was vinegar all over the counter.

And now I know why children lack the capacity to pay attention to very small details like closing a cabinet or wiping a counter completely or neutralizing strong smells. It's so that parents can catch them when they're up to no good.

So, I asked him what he'd been doing while I was gone. He was all, "You know, just my history lesson and stuff." And stuff... Yeah, that's his way of pretending he's not lying to me. Later if I press him, he can say something like, "But I said 'and stuff' so I wasn't really lying, I just didn't tell you what the stuff was." He has a deep love for the loophole, that kid.

But not so fast, little man. You turned 14 on Sunday which means two things: You've been around long enough to know better and it's been at least that long since I fell off the turnip truck (and apparently turned into my mother, nay, my grandmother with that line).

So, I ask him... "What stuff?"

Blink. Blink. Blink. BlinkBlinkBlink.

I can see his wheels turning, deciding whether or not to out himself and face the consequences of his actions... He's like a deer in headlights, so I give him an indication of how bad things will be if he decides to lie (hoping I have no evidence against him)... "What's that smell?"

He knows I have him dead to rights and he tells me what he did.

A lecture on trust, truth, chemical reactions in the absence of goggles / an adult and stuff ensues... I leave it at that for now.

All I can say is at least I was down at the fire station in case he tried anything hefty... but don't worry, I keep the thermite and matches locked up. Ha.